I couldn't do math without my unfailing calculator. I count on it to get me through my homework.

I got into an argument with my Algebra teacher. I'm really worried about the aftermath.

"In Fascist Italy, how were people instructed to approach Mussolini?" "Pass Il Duce on the left-hand side."

I told the students: "The formulas for figuring Pascals and Newtons won't appear on the test. No pressure, then."

It Illinois me, studying American geography.

When it comes to adding information to a map, I am legend.

"Can anyone name the 50th state?" "Sally does! Hold on, Alaska."

My Geometry teacher in high school wasn't funny at all. In class, she always made inappropriate peace signs with radii. She never knew where to draw the line.

My grandma taught me all about the fifty states. Iowa so much.

The woodshop teacher is a real head-turner.

When asked to list the Great Lakes by size, the student got to the fourth, panicked, and fell into an Erie silence.

Flying up to the sun? How rid-Icarus!

I General Lee don't find jokes about the Civil War to be very funny.

Your essay on "The Raven" was good, but it's nothing to crow about.